When I talk with moms about their birth stories, their pregnancies, and their experience caring for a newborn, I often hear, “Nobody told me…’ and then whatever the particular thing is that they felt unprepared for.
I remember sweating what seemed like a river for a few nights after Elias, my first child, was born. I had no idea why I was so hot and so WET! Those hormones do crazy things, for sure.
So, what surprised, shocked, disturbed, or just plain snuck up on you when you were pregnant, in labour, or had just had your baby?
Tell us in the comments section, and I’ll publish some of them in a new blog post later. Let’s help inform and prepare each other!
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
My little girl Aubrey had blood in her diaper a couple days after she was born. It turns out infant girls can have their first shedding of their uterus lining when they are this young! Meaning they actually have a period. My midwife forgot to tell me so of course I freaked out. Another thing which isn't so nice is how hard your stools are if you are breastfeeding for the first time! It is horrible! I suggest warm water and fibre powder. One of the hardest things I learned too was that you get frustrated and I mean REALLY frustrated sometimes with your baby. It's very common. You just have to put them down and take a minute to collect yourself and that way you're sure not to hurt them by accident. There are so many things you don't expect with a baby. It helps to have other friends who are supportive and encouraging to turn to.
Nobody told me that when you're first starting breastfeeding that you need to make sure that you let your nipples dry after feeding the baby before doing your bra back up. Mine stuck to the fabric and I took a layer of skin off. Ouch! I've been passing this info on to all of the moms-to-be that I meet because I want everyone to avoid it if they can help it.
That would be scary to see blood in your baby's diaper! And I think it's so, so true that you just don't realize how frustrated you will get with your baby sometimes.
Wow, I never knew that you could take a layer of skin off with wet nipples. Ouch.
Thanks for sharing.
Nobody told me that having a newborn might be tough on our marriage. Lack of sleep made us both irritable. Paying so much attention to the new little guy made my husband almost a little bit jealous (not quite the right word) as he felt that the baby was getting so much love and he was getting whatever was leftover. Fortunately after being through it twice, we now know that once we get through the first few months, things get better and better!
Nobody told me what actual labor contractions feel like. I thought they would just be increasingly more and more intense tightenings like the Braxton Hicks, until they started to hurt. I never realized that it actually just felt like the most horrendous menstrual cramps of all time – I was totally unprepared for that!
Another thing, with regard to nursing, is that we need to make sure all new moms trying to nurse know that it isn't always easy, especially at first! What we're shown on TV and when we see mothers nursing in public, they have it down and it looks so easy. In reality, when a first time mom starts, it is often difficult, and painful! We need to make sure they all know this is normal and not to give up! I was just about at the end of my rope, so sore and worried that my poor baby girl was starving to death. I reached out to an experienced mom friend, writing her this looooong e-mail asking for help, and then sat down to try again when things just all of a sudden clicked and we never looked back. But I had a lot of support, and very strong feelings about exclusive nursing – many moms don't have the support or the info about how important nursing really is, and so many difficulties in the beginning can lead to a lot of moms deciding nursing isn't worth it, and/or thinking there is something wrong with them b/c it isn't as easy for them as it is "supposed to be" from what they have seen! We need to make sure they all have the support & info!
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